tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72919592899279333852024-02-20T08:01:02.318-08:00Spiller WritesAuthor Robert Spiller discusses anything he darn well pleases: writing, Bonnie Pinkwater, math problems, and musings in general.Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.comBlogger120125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-80728895354867123832015-01-20T19:02:00.002-08:002015-01-20T19:02:38.321-08:00My Stuff at PPWC<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Okay, pay attention. I am going to lay out before you the three classes I will be teaching at the upcoming Pikes Peak Writers Conference, which by the way will be my 13th. Can you spell <b>Triskaidekaphobia?</b></span>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>The Art of the Funny Bone</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Do you like to laugh? Would you like to make other do the same? This is a class to give you some pointers in just how to do that. I will do my utmost to make you smile while teaching you the art - or is a science? - of taking others along for the ride. There will be jokes, so be prepared.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Writing the Amateur Sleuth</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Here's the straight poop. I write mysteries where a math teacher solves murders. Of course, no self respecting math professor would be caught dead - dead, get it? - going anywhere near a murder, but there you have it. If you have aspirations of making your, pick one: Tattoo Artist, Zookeeper, Ice Cream Vendor, Curling Instructor, Massage Therapist poke his or her nose into homicide, then this is the class for you.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Author 101</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">This class I get to teach with the wonderful and totally fun Angel Smits. We will pass along the wisdom of the ages or at least some stuff that we have learned along the way. We'll talk about Agents and the Writing Life, Rejections and Indie Publishing. Truth is we hope to answer every one of your burning questions regarding Authoringoshipness (that's a word, I'm pretty sure). Now this one is on Thursday morning in the pre-conference classes, so look for it there. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">And if you see me at the conference please stop and say. Well, maybe not in the bathroom but just about anywhere else.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-30015756268633883132015-01-09T10:05:00.000-08:002015-01-09T10:53:56.285-08:00Pikes Peak Writers Conference: Read and Critique<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Here's the deal. I am excited (that's spelled somewhat intimidated) to be the Read And Critique Coordinator for the 2015 Pikes Peak Writers Conference - in my opinion the finest, most useful, funnest (yeah, that's a word) writing conference in the solar system.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">In aid of being more than just a pretty face, let me school you about Read and Critique sessions in general and the types of sessions in particular.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: #cc0000;">What the heck is a Read and Critique Appointment, you say?</span> </b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">- Are you proud of your work? Here is a chance to show it off!! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> - Industry Professionals (Authors, Agents, Editors) will provide immediate, I'm talking on the spot, feedback concerning the beginning of your manuscript. And it doesn't have to be completed as of the conference.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">What are the types of Read and Critique Sessions?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Like the title suggests, you are with a published author. You read your opening two pages (Don't cheat. We're talking industry standard format). You are in a small intimate setting, just you, your author, and a few other participants. Author provides immediate feedback. Additional feedback from the other participants is encouraged.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">A staffer reads your first page, 16 lines (either chapter 1 or your prologue) aloud. You remain anonymous. A panel of one Author, one Agent, and one Editor listens then each provides insight and direction. These sessions are open to attendees to listen in and take notes. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Read and Critique X</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">You read aloud your first page - again 16 lines - to an Agent or Editor. The coolness factor in this type of session is that every effort will be made to match you up with professionals who align with your genre. As in all Read and Critique sessions feedback will be immediate and one-on-one.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>How might I avail myself of these wonderful opportunities to have my work evaluated?</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Glad you asked!!</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">First be diligent. Decide what type of Read and Critique suits you. Research the conference faculty at the Pikes Peak Writers Website.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Next, request an appointment on your registration form.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Which brings us to registration. Register for the conference ASAP. The earlier you are ensconced in the conference the more likely you will receive the Read and Critique appointment of your choice. Be sure to provide your genre, since this will determine how you are assigned a session and who you will be with.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Oh yeah, one more thing. All Read and Critique sessions are at no extra charge.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">If you have any additional questions I would advise a delightful excursion to the Pikes Peak Writers Website. Write on. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-2959762888730659172015-01-01T10:01:00.000-08:002015-01-01T10:01:46.592-08:00A New Year's Tradition Revisited<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">When I was first courting my wife, the wonderful and sexy Barbara Ebright, she was working at a now defunct restaurant La Petite Mason - she looked hot in her waitress uniform.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Several times I would come in for a cup of coffee and a creme brulee. Barbara would wait on me and I would make that desert and coffee last forever. When I was done I would tip her fifty dollars, thinking she would think me a spontaneous and lavish suitor. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Anyway, the highlight of the year and for years to come (even after we were an official item, and later married) was News Years Eve. Barbara would invariably work, and I would dress up - it was a very fancy restaurant - and show up around 11:45. The owner knew me by now and plied me with specialty wines and deserts and I would sit at a table set aside for me. At midnight all the patrons would go outside to see the fireworks explode over Pikes Peak. I would hold Barbara's hand and at midnight we would share a New Year's kiss.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">That restaurant is now gone, but last night Barbara -who has retired - and I decided to go back to stand outside that restaurant on Tenth and Colorado and and watch the fireworks explode over the peak. It was a bit on the cold side but it was worth it. I held her hand and she leaned her head on my shoulder. At midnight, as the rockets exploded over America's mountain, I held one very sexy ex-waitress and we kissed in the new year.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">HAPPY NEW YEAR ALL!!!!!</span></div>
Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-44832241366262775182015-01-01T09:29:00.006-08:002015-01-01T09:29:53.754-08:00The Widow's Share<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">A skinflint minister died and left the following will:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">$8000 is to be split among a minister's widow, his 5 sons, and his 4 daughters. Every son should receive three times as much as a daughter (the minister was a bit of a chauvinist). Every daughter should receive twice as much as their mother (he was also not too fond of his wife). </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">What was the widow's share?</span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-56289941397591771682014-12-30T21:36:00.002-08:002014-12-30T21:36:53.570-08:00Pigs, Horses, Cows, And Sheep...and Bartering Farmers<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Three farmers met at market and each made an offer:</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisQanR_oYzFNWQtsfoP_10ufjTaxNW69wQL0O_MZdAXLkdevyNqqWU6dwhk_l0BVQ-5HulNB9Jkc3bZDsIp2Wbc2mCu7N8PA92hW1IY5H4fGXwfBJkgdpAvIsnBb5D9VNGVrQcLc8yRFbe/s1600/horse.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisQanR_oYzFNWQtsfoP_10ufjTaxNW69wQL0O_MZdAXLkdevyNqqWU6dwhk_l0BVQ-5HulNB9Jkc3bZDsIp2Wbc2mCu7N8PA92hW1IY5H4fGXwfBJkgdpAvIsnBb5D9VNGVrQcLc8yRFbe/s1600/horse.jpg" height="317" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Farnsworth to Cubbington - "I'll give you 6 of my pigs for 1 of your horses, and then you'll have twice as many animals here as me."</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2bVXSAT7nM7h7rkaTrnm-M4IiogKaVorUTWM7yyPBPTqgpaixhTuw1coNRPSmmQ_AJ5ylWrm9GBEax-9G0t4aIeMz8F0jseImKECp5vTqZNNRgNz_qBoL5HTCpuocinq9AINhHNmgCToZ/s1600/cow1.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2bVXSAT7nM7h7rkaTrnm-M4IiogKaVorUTWM7yyPBPTqgpaixhTuw1coNRPSmmQ_AJ5ylWrm9GBEax-9G0t4aIeMz8F0jseImKECp5vTqZNNRgNz_qBoL5HTCpuocinq9AINhHNmgCToZ/s1600/cow1.png" height="226" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Nebish to Farnsworth - "I like the way you do business. However, I'll give you 14 of my sheep for 1 of your horses, then you, my good man, will have three times as many animals here as I."</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLftB5w60ti2rAQT-RXuwZn105xzGfAsIp8MZagnC5tLm6jaC0Ci79WjE1OT-TQlxTtiPDQu3oWp2kG8WKBoDpsvbp1EMQwhgmhjfdJYcx-h-XyjOrrX8BCgTm8ImRqCMfy0SJNVThsIJp/s1600/pig4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLftB5w60ti2rAQT-RXuwZn105xzGfAsIp8MZagnC5tLm6jaC0Ci79WjE1OT-TQlxTtiPDQu3oWp2kG8WKBoDpsvbp1EMQwhgmhjfdJYcx-h-XyjOrrX8BCgTm8ImRqCMfy0SJNVThsIJp/s1600/pig4.jpg" height="323" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Cubbington to Nebish - "I can play this game. I'll give you 4 cows for 1 horse, then you'll have six times as many animals here as myself."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">How many animals (don't worry about types of beasts) did Farnsworth, Cubbington, and Nebish bring to market?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-64300827914534675032014-12-22T10:25:00.001-08:002014-12-22T10:25:30.293-08:00Tricksters: Loki and Maui - Chapter 2<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRHoeOuAdRZ7Z8l6P2GXjGdyQLSNl3L4l3WXMGuxKhYdc5V-3JnhKLFbb7hUbDgNZToRq4lLaFTxv1F8sRJKe7JPXupaqW36CR7QuXeybAnds2K6RQ-b2R9eR4n6J_4CeptJbUMeA2wWgf/s1600/Loki.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRHoeOuAdRZ7Z8l6P2GXjGdyQLSNl3L4l3WXMGuxKhYdc5V-3JnhKLFbb7hUbDgNZToRq4lLaFTxv1F8sRJKe7JPXupaqW36CR7QuXeybAnds2K6RQ-b2R9eR4n6J_4CeptJbUMeA2wWgf/s1600/Loki.jpg" height="400" width="282" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><b>Loki - Trickster God of Asgard</b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Let's just get this out of the way. Loki was an asshole.<span style="color: #990000;"> </span>He<span style="color: #990000;"> </span>comes across as one of the creative forces of the universe but also as an evil force bent on harm. He is the father of some of the most malevolent creatures in all of Norse mythology: the horrible goddess <span style="color: #990000;">Hel</span>, the monstrous wolf <span style="color: #990000;">Fenrir</span>, the world serpent <span style="color: #990000;">Jormundgand</span>. When the most beautiful of the Norse Gods, <span style="color: #990000;">Baldr</span>, had a vision of his own death, <span style="color: #990000;">Frigg </span>the Queen of Asgard made every living thing in all the realms promise not to harm him. Somehow, mistletoe was overlooked. <span style="color: #990000;">Loki</span>, finding this out, and jealous of <span style="color: #990000;">Baldr</span>, arranged for a sprig of mistletoe to pierce <span style="color: #990000;">Baldr's</span> heart. When <span style="color: #990000;">Odin</span> commanded that all creatures in the all the realms weep and mourn <span style="color: #990000;">Baldr</span>, only <span style="color: #990000;">Loki</span> refused to do so. This refusal created the inevitable <span style="color: #990000;">Ragnarok</span>, the end of all things.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="color: red;">Maui -</span> <span style="color: red;">The</span> <span style="color: red;">Polynesian Trickster Demi-god </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Unlike Loki, <span style="color: #cc0000;">Maui</span> (for whom the island is named) is for the most part good. His tricks seemed to be all in the arena of helping the people be all that they could be. <span style="color: #cc0000;">Maui</span> tricked the goddess of fire into revealing the secrets of her element. He tricked the sun into slowing down (I guess it was just whizzing around way too fast) so folks could have enough light to get things done. He also used his penis to stop a tidal wave that threatened to destroy the islands - which tells you something about the Polynesian culture. <span style="color: #cc0000;">Maui</span> is credited with the actual raising of the Hawaiian islands. He even died to save the people from a horrible she-monster, (he was killed by her vagina; cut in half no less) but in doing so brought death (I guess until then folks were immortal) in the world. Bummer.</span></div>
Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-58544829474988608742014-12-21T16:16:00.002-08:002014-12-21T16:16:52.521-08:00I Love the Blues!!!! Ana Popovic Kicks It.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLTUB7YbajhEgNO_cKTxPqyVRzDUkjMkHiOqE0kOu30kZZcAcsK4nMzKOb7qDEW0lECQ-WMn0KQqHdI7QYqU6n5dRSCE8s6BiCPUPYd96ROEjh-tuL3cXHSboaheotXvBhkKOYAEDQibMl/s1600/Ana.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLTUB7YbajhEgNO_cKTxPqyVRzDUkjMkHiOqE0kOu30kZZcAcsK4nMzKOb7qDEW0lECQ-WMn0KQqHdI7QYqU6n5dRSCE8s6BiCPUPYd96ROEjh-tuL3cXHSboaheotXvBhkKOYAEDQibMl/s1600/Ana.jpg" height="266" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">I recently acquired two heart-stopping blues albums: <em><span style="color: #cc0000;"><strong>Unconditional</strong></span></em> <span style="color: black;">and </span><span style="color: #cc0000;"><em><strong>Can You Stand the Heat</strong></em> </span><span style="color: black;">by </span><span style="color: #cc0000;"><strong><em>Ana Popovic</em></strong>. </span><span style="color: black;">I now find myself listening to these songs again and again. To say they're good is to admit to a lack of word power skills.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="color: black;">Out of Belgrade Serbia, Popovic can do it all. She writes songs with grit and heart. She sings with an authenticity and power that transforms every song into a revelation. And she plays guitar (both acoustic and electric) like she's channeling any number of Rock and Blues legends; Eric Clapton, Albert King, And now I'm going to go out on a limb - Jimi Hendrix.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS; font-size: large;">She has released 4 albums in total (The first was <span style="color: #cc0000;"><strong><em>Still Making History</em></strong></span><span style="color: black;"> and the second a live album </span><span style="color: #cc0000;"><strong><em>An Evening at Trasimeno Lake </em></strong></span><span style="color: black;">). I went to Popovic's web site and sampled songs from each of these - and yes I loved them - but I was especially interested in her first release, </span><span style="color: #cc0000;"><strong><em>Still Making History.</em></strong></span><span style="color: black;"> I wanted to see what this extraordinary woman sounded like when she first sprang out of the gate. Would she have the same sound almost a decade ago?</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS; font-size: large;">She did not. I sampled a song <span style="color: black;"><span style="color: #cc0000;"><em>Hungry</em></span> and immediately smiled. It reminded me of another debut album released over forty years ago. I'm talking about the first James Gang album that introduced the world to Joe Walsh. Hungry took me back </span><span style="color: #cc0000;"><em>Funk 49 and Walk Away. </em></span></span><br />
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Trebuchet MS; font-size: large;">A year later when she played at Trasimeno lake she was already evolving the sophisticated chops and powerful vocals she would display on <strong><em><span style="color: #cc0000;">Unconditional</span></em></strong> and <span style="color: #cc0000;"><strong><em>Can You Stand the Heat. </em></strong></span><span style="color: black;">By the time these gems were released, Ana had morphed into a force to be reckoned with. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS; font-size: large;">I'm going to leave you with a simple way to see if I'm jiving you about this artist. Find her web site. Sample a few songs from each of her albums. Be prepared to be blown away.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS; font-size: large;">Merry Christmas all.</span> <span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">Oh by the way, Ana was nominated for Blues Female Artist of 2014. I just thought you might like to know.</span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-61422038136597891342014-12-20T10:07:00.000-08:002014-12-20T10:19:46.553-08:00Tricksters - Ananse and Coyote - Chapter 1<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Tricksters have been common in world myths throughout history. They often bedevil their more serious brethren and mankind. They also provide lessons on how not to take yourself so seriously. And in rare cases, are essential in creation and the survival of human kind. Below are just two of my favorites.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHv4AOkGXJh0LhOdwo8F1sPgh28iUAkbUHoAcqbeYJUyPBchgth4eFo6jFq2Wp58i9dbPyXblS3nEv-WwFqij7WcK3SsdjSwYpxZ6aQS7y30rFy59G_z_rg2kD_zHQu70HxMwPm3u-OTvd/s1600/Ananse.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHv4AOkGXJh0LhOdwo8F1sPgh28iUAkbUHoAcqbeYJUyPBchgth4eFo6jFq2Wp58i9dbPyXblS3nEv-WwFqij7WcK3SsdjSwYpxZ6aQS7y30rFy59G_z_rg2kD_zHQu70HxMwPm3u-OTvd/s1600/Ananse.jpg" height="331" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i style="color: red; font-weight: bold;">Ananze - </i><b><i><span style="color: red;">The Spider Storyteller</span></i></b>, <span style="color: red;">Ananse</span> is responsible for many of the stories that have been handed down from West African and eventually West Indian traditions. A few of these have been re-translated by american slave cultures into familiar tales, most notably the tales of Uncle Remus's Brer Rabbit. But first and foremost <span style="color: red;">Ananse</span> is a spider, and a cunning one. And like most tricksters he was eternally horny. He even seduced the Sky God's daughter. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>A few of Anase's tricks:</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="color: red;">The Sky God's Challenge - </span>When the Sky God (probably still pissed because Ananse seduced his daughter) insisted <span style="color: red;">Ananse</span> bring back something from Earth but wouldn't tell him what. <span style="color: red;">Ananse </span>tricked him into revealing it was the darkness, the moon,and the sun. <span style="color: red;">Ananse</span> brought darkness out of a gunny sack and no one could see anything. Then he brought out the moon and they could see a little. When he brought out the sun many of the animals were blinded by its glare. Thus <span style="color: red;">Ananse</span> invented blindness.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="color: red;">The Sticky Doll - Ananse</span> tricked the High God Nyame (who never let any stories be told. He was a bit of a dick.) into letting <span style="color: red;">Ananse</span> be the the keeper and teller of all stories by capturing a fairy and bringing it to the High God. He painted a doll with sticky sap and set it in a meadow where fairies liked to dance.The doll had sitting in its lap some yam mash. A fairy came along and asked if he could have some of the mash. <span style="color: red;">Ananse </span>made the doll's head nod. When the fairy tasted the mash, he thanked the doll, who said nothing. The fairy was insulted and slapped the doll - his hand stuck. Thus <span style="color: red;">Ananse</span> brought the captured fairy to Nyame, who put <span style="color: red;">Ananse</span> in charge of stories. And thus stories were shared with the world. And yes this is the basis for the Brer Rabbit story, 'The Tar Baby'. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i style="color: red; font-weight: bold;">Coyote - Inventor of Death. </i>Because coyotes can be found throughout most of North America the <span style="color: red;">Coyote Trickster</span> is a staple of many of the plains and mountain tribes. Bored with the perfection of creation (people never got sick, never grew old, food was plentiful), <span style="color: red;">Coyote</span> tried his own hand at creating beings, who turned out only absurd and funny looking. This cracked up <span style="color: red;">Coyote</span> who laughed so loud he attracted the Attention of the Earth-Initiate, who had created the heavens and the Earth. When told that laughing at his poor wretches was rude, he denied doing it and thus invented lying. Then he approached the happy people of the world and convinced them that sickness, death, and competition were the best things ever (tricksters always have the gift of gab). Unfortunately, the first being to die was <span style="color: red;">Coyote's </span>own son. Thus weeping was invented.</span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-43356412593761421682014-12-13T07:14:00.000-08:002014-12-13T07:14:11.840-08:00I'm Afraid so, Captain - Wonderful, Marvelous Phobias - Chapter 3<span style="font-size: large;">More phobias, you say? But of course. Let's see what we can dig up.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b>Let's begin with a pair that Vampires might ascribe to:</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: red;">Esophobia - Fear of Daylight.</span></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: red;">Staurophobia - Fear of Crosses</span></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">And now a couple that I'm not really sure what they are. I'd love an explanation, dear reader, so if you know leave me a comment.</span><br />
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Walloonophobia - </span><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">You guessed it, <span style="color: blue;">Fear of Walloons</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Here's one that both delights me and puzzles me. <span style="color: blue;">Zemmiphobia - Fear of the Great Mole Rat. </span>Really? This sounds like something a tribe in New Guinea might worship. "Oh Great Mole Rat, hear my prayer."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">As a mathematician, I object to this next one most strenuously. </i><i style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: #990000;">Octophobia - Fear of the Number 8. </span>Several questions come to mind, beginning with WHY? </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>Compared to <span style="color: red;">Octophobia</span>, the next few make some semblance of sense.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i><span style="color: red;">Pteronophobia</span> <span style="color: red;">- Fear of Being Tickled by a Feather. </span>I know what you're thinking. "That wouldn't be so bad." But when I think about it I'm always tied naked to a chair. Oh, did I reveal too much?</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i><span style="color: red;"> Myxophobia - Fear of Slime. </span>I mean come on, slime for pete's sake. The stuff is gooey, and drips from your face and is so hard to get off your pajamas.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i><span style="color: red;">Enosiophobia</span> <span style="color: red;">- Fear of Having Committed Some Unpardonable Sin. </span>I'm not the only one that has this one, am I?</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b>And now a few that just make me go Hmmmmmm.</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: #990000;">Levophobia - Fear of the Left Side of Your Body. </span>In an earlier post we discussed <span style="color: #990000;">Dextrophobia - Fear of the Right Side of Your Body</span>. So if you had that one and <span style="color: #990000;">Levophobia</span><span style="color: #cc0000;"> </span>you really would have nowhere to turn. Oh my God, I really am clever.</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: #990000;">Linonophobia - Fear of String.</span> If you're like me, you're sad for kitties who have this one. And maybe kite flyers. How about String Theorists?</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: #990000;">Peladophobia - Fear of Bald People.</span> For reasons I don't think I have to mention, I hope I don't get this one. I could never look in a mirror again. </b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">For this last one, I want you to imagine a world where everyone has <span style="color: blue;"> </span>a <span style="color: blue;"><b>Fear of Names</b>. </span>We wouldn't name our children. We address one another as "Hey you!". What would they put on our driver's licenses? I could go on and on, but you get the picture (oh yeah, that's what they'd put on our driver's licenses). This one's called <b style="color: blue;">Nomatophobia. </b>Okay, one more. There would be no Alex Trebeck.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>Goodbye for now. Be well and fear not.</i></span>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-53861652341176747722014-12-12T07:29:00.000-08:002014-12-12T07:29:09.820-08:00Fraidy Cat! - Phobias - Chapter 2<span style="font-size: large;">Here we are again at the intersection of <i>Allshookup Avenue</i> and <i>Wetmypants Lane. </i>And by that I mean another round of phobias. I scream, you scream, we all scream. Things that frighten, give you the jitters, make you nervous, possibly terrify, and most certainly leave you with a queasy feeling in your tum tum. Sooooooo, here we go.</span><br />
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<b style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>I love this one - Omphalophobia - Fear of Belly Buttons. I want to know just how many people walk into a psychiatrist's office and say, "My navel creeps me out!"</i></b><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I also wonder if these might be people who also have <span style="color: red;">Proctophobia</span> - <span style="color: red;">Fear of Rectums. </span>I'm thinking folks who have <b>Omphalaphobia and</b> <b>Proctophobia </b>are screwed coming and going. Oooh, I'm so clever.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">Speaking of Phobias, that would be bad to have in pairs, consider - </span><span style="color: #990000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">Microphobia (Fear of Small Things)</span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"> and </span><span style="color: #990000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">Megalophobia,</span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"> wait for it, </span><span style="color: #990000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">(Fear of Large Things)</span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">. If someone was afflicted with this pair they'd have to go through life ordering the medium size coffee (That's Grande at Starbucks). And of course, they would be fans of Baby Bear - not too big, not too small, but just right.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>As bad as the last pair was, they're nothing compared to this next divergent grouping. Imagine having <span style="color: blue;">Medorthophobia (Fear of having an Erect Penis) </span>coupled with <span style="color: blue;">Medomalacuphobia (Fear of Losing an Erect Penis). </span>The only joke I can think of starts with the words, "On the one hand.....</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>Well, enough of these weird phobias. Let's get back to something sensible - <span style="color: red;">Lutraphobia - Fear of Otters. </span></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><i>And another sensible one <span style="color: #990000;">- Pogonophobia - Fear of Beards</span></i></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I will leave you with a phobia whose name makes so much sense that I'm surprised that it's not an everyday word. I'm talking about <span style="color: blue;">Fear of Long Words. </span>Drum roll please: <span style="color: blue;">Hippopitomonstrosequipedaliophobia.</span></span></i></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>And with that I say good night to all and to all a good night. Ho Ho Ho.</i></span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-52013199971397083292014-12-11T07:29:00.000-08:002014-12-11T07:29:50.023-08:00What are You Afraid Of? - Phobias Chapter 1<span style="font-size: x-large;">I don't know about you but I have always been fascinated by Phobias. I have a few of my own, which I won't admit to at this time. However, this list is purely for fun. I have found some of what I consider peculiar fears. So without further ado. some phobias for you.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Here's one that seems to be on the rise. <i style="color: red; font-weight: bold;">Coulrophobia - Fear of Clowns. </i>Now you have a name for it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>I'm going to go out on a limb and predict that most vampires have this fear - <b>Alliumophobia - </b>Fear of Garlic.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Here's an interesting one and I think I might have this just a little bit - <span style="color: lime;">Automatonophobia - </span>Fear of ventriloquist dummies.</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I love this one - Alektorophobia - Fear of Chickens.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>Here is a trio that seem to be math related.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><span style="color: #cc0000;">Apeirophobia - Fear of Infinity</span></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><span style="color: #660000;">Asymmetriphobia - Fear of Asymmetric Things: I think Sheldon on Big Bang Theory has this.</span></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Baraphobia - Fear of Gravity</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>Here's another one that made me smile - Consecotaleophobia - Fear of Chopsticks</b></span></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>Here's one that made me scratch my head - Dextrophobia - Fear of the Right Side of Your Body. How the heck do you get away from this one?</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>How about the Fear of Newts? - Batrachophobia</i></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Here's one I can kind of understand - Arachibutyrophobia - Fear of Peanut Butter Getting Stuck to the Roof of your Mouth!!</b></span></i><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">And that's all for now. Stay tuned - or better yet, follow this blog - for more of what scares you. Merry Christmas. Unless you're afraid of that.</span></i><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><b><br /></b></span></i></span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-31623333918502329082014-12-10T08:44:00.003-08:002014-12-10T08:58:19.289-08:00Cool Fictional Horses - Chapter 2: Cartoon Horses<b><i><u><span style="font-size: large;">Cartoon Steeds</span></u></i></b><br />
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<b style="font-size: x-large;"><i>Bullseye</i></b><span style="font-size: large;"> - Toy Horse companion of Woody the Cowboy in Pixar's Toy Story</span><br />
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<i style="font-size: x-large;"><b>Pokey</b></i><span style="font-size: large;"> - Stretchy horse belonging to equally stretchy cartoon character Gumby.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><b>Horse </b></i>- Equine friend of the pride of the Canadian Mounted Police, Dudley Do Right</span><br />
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<b style="font-size: x-large;"><i>Quickdraw McGraw </i></b><span style="font-size: large;">- With his faithful donkey companion Baba Looey, Quickdraw rounded up lawbreakers in the old west. Quickdraw also had a secret identity, the guitar wielding vigilante El Kabong, who would whack wrongdoers with a Flamenco guitar. Like Baba Looey was fond of saying, "Quickdraw has a lot upstairs, no brains, just an empty lot."</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Maximus </i>- The war horse that makes an uneasy alliance with Rapunzel and her thieving companion Flynn. Incredibly self-righteous, Maximus seems bent on bringing the thief to justice.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Spirit, Stallion of the Cimmaron - </i>Free and hell-bent on staying that way, Spirit hangs tough in the face of a relentless cavalry officer who wants to break..well, his spirit. In the end, the horse not only frees himself but a captured Indian boy.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>Comet</i></b> - Supergirl's super horse. Once a centaur, Biron of Greece was a friend of the sorceress Circe. Having saved her life, Circe wanted to reward him by turning him human but the spell was fouled and he became totally a horse. Circe tried to undo at least part of the damage by giving him super-powers and making him immortal. Biron does turn human when a certain comet passes near Earth. Then he becomes 'Bronco' Billy' a rodeo rider.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Captain </i>- In 101 Dalmatians, Captain is part of a quasi-military group of animals who aid in the search for the kidnapped puppies. In the end, they foil the evil plans of Cruella DeVille and her henchmen.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Boxer - </i>In Animal Farm, Boxer, a loyal and powerful Morgan, supports Napolean, the pig in all his endeavors to change the farm from being run by humans to being sustained by animals. In the end, however, Napolean betrays him and sells him to the glue factory.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Nightmare - </i>Belonging to Casper the Friendly Ghost, Nightmare is naturally a ghost horse. Casper, who really doesn't need a horse since he can fly, is often seen riding nightmare when in the company of Wendy the Good Little Witch - when she is riding her broom.</span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-63378699331331890692014-12-09T16:15:00.002-08:002014-12-09T16:15:28.151-08:00Creation Stories Chapter 4 - Chinese and Hindu: Once Again the Cosmic Egg but with the Sacrificial Parent Thrown in.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: red;">Hindu</span> - In the beginning </i>there was a marvelous gold cosmic egg created by <span style="color: red; font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Dyaus, The Sky Father</span><i style="font-weight: bold;"> and </i><span style="color: red; font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Prithvi, The Earth Mother. </span>From this egg comes <span style="color: red;"><b><i>Purusha</i></b></span>, their son, who is immediately sacrificed and dismembered so his body can be the stuff of creation - his blood the rivers and lakes, his hair the plants, his bones the mountains. Once a place is established, man and woman are created but the woman, who considers herself the man's sister is fearful of incest, so she runs away and becomes a series of animals. Unfortunately for her, in each incarnation she is captured and mated with by the man. Thus all the species of animals are born. Finally, she relents and the human race is brought into being.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b style="font-style: italic;"><span style="color: red;">China - </span>The Pangu Myth - </b>In the beginning there was chaos and into this chaos emerged a great cosmic egg with the super-god <span style="color: red;">Pangu</span> inside. <span style="color: red;">Pangu </span>was cramped in the egg and eventually smashed his way out. His first act was to create the heavens and the Earth out of the stuff of chaos. Potent as he was, <span style="color: red;">Pangu</span> was not immortal and when he died, his body was transformed into the rest of the universe: His eyes became the sun and the moon, His blood rivers, His voice thunder, His hair all the plants. Before even the cosmic egg there existed the great <span style="color: red;">Goddess Nuwa. </span>When she saw all that <span style="color: red;">Pangu</span> had created, she decided to make humans. Now even back then there was a pecking order. Nobles were created from pure clay but to make the ordinary people she dragged a rope through mud then shook it. Each drop of mud became an ordinary person.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-48672227296989988582014-12-06T23:07:00.000-08:002014-12-06T23:07:32.493-08:00Scary as Hell Comic Book Villains - Chapter 1<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Okay, here's the deal. Pretty much all the villains in graphic novel land are fierce. For the past decade the bar has been raised with regard to what a bad guy will do. Out and out murder - Carnage. The deaths of millions - The Watchmen. Infecting poor victims with diseases. Stealing their souls. The villains below, though, have caught my attention for particular nastiness. But if you're like me, you like to be shocked, and sometimes scared out of your socks.</span><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Marvel</span><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></i></b></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFTTadWc-JK4XWKvF3R6ZyyioAFh2TCP_SLk1GzkxWyZIEMAi76Mo8KEpw_8w0BUZX2FdvbA56lm0yZ7duC3NOd0Z4GMTNXsRklcXPLDzIwb2D1BYw767kkjs4vJBHVy-vi7MVD6vbgnR1/s1600/Carnage2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFTTadWc-JK4XWKvF3R6ZyyioAFh2TCP_SLk1GzkxWyZIEMAi76Mo8KEpw_8w0BUZX2FdvbA56lm0yZ7duC3NOd0Z4GMTNXsRklcXPLDzIwb2D1BYw767kkjs4vJBHVy-vi7MVD6vbgnR1/s1600/Carnage2.jpg" height="215" width="400" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: large;"><i><b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Look at these guys. They are uuuuugly!!</span></b></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><b><span style="color: red;">Carnage</span></b> and <b><span style="color: #20124d;">Venom</span></b>- </i>These Spiderman villains are basically brothers. Here's the skinny. It all begins with a black Spiderman suit that's well...alive. For a time Spidey himself wore this living costume and he got stronger but also all weird. To make a long story short, Spidey discarded the bad suit and it crawled onto Eddie Brock who became Venom. While Venom was bad enough, like a suped-up, long-tongued, razor-toothed Spiderman on steroids who occasionally ate his victims, Carnage was a whole lot worse. Already a psychopath, Cletus Kasady, had no interest in world domination or even robbing banks. He only wanted to kill and his new red duds - a portion of Venom's living costume - allowed him to do just. They projected blades and strangling ropes the way Spiderman's projected webs. In the end, although it was out of character for him, Spiderman was forced to go along with the killing of Carnage. Unfortunately, Venom is still hanging around and still bat-shit loony.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNYcdFCJsQUTjN11LmpWmgmopxKY9eu2AMRBALKEh1pUwW3B0SzC2OKxR_rBgbEfg0Lbwrb7KQ-8l0yUz_l9Q9E4ffcBhOXQL60UfYmw4ZoNCgs3hwlghr3-QG_EgZ902W2gnsJ_m1cTIq/s1600/Galactus.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNYcdFCJsQUTjN11LmpWmgmopxKY9eu2AMRBALKEh1pUwW3B0SzC2OKxR_rBgbEfg0Lbwrb7KQ-8l0yUz_l9Q9E4ffcBhOXQL60UfYmw4ZoNCgs3hwlghr3-QG_EgZ902W2gnsJ_m1cTIq/s1600/Galactus.jpg" height="331" width="400" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b><i>Don't mind me. I'm just here to eat your world.</i></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #674ea7; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Galactus </span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-weight: bold;"> - </i><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This dude's aliases tell it all: Devourer of Worlds, Destroyer of Civilizations, or just plain Planet Eater. Once a regular guy in the universe that preceded ours, Galen is the last remnant of that universe. You could say he was altered in the final cosmic blast. After sleeping for God knows for how long he awoke a cosmic vampire who not only must consume worlds to live but these worlds have to have a good sized population to be tasty. Together with his herald, The Silver Surfer, he travels the cosmos in a space ship the size of a solar system. The routine is as follows. Silver Surfer - yes he's silver and yes he zooms into the stratosphere on a surf board - warns everybody that their days are numbered and there's not a whole lot they can do about it. Then after a time, where the inhabitants weep and rend their clothing, Galactus blasts the planet with some energy doohickey and gobbles up the pieces. Of course, he would eventually set his sights on Earth. That goes without saying.</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #660000; font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><i>Let me get this out of the way. Growing up I was a whole lot more afraid of monsters who were, shall we say, intimate. Monsters, like the Wolfman or a vampire, who would single you out for their monstering. Giant things, like building-sized spiders, might step right over you and not notice you at all. At least that was my reasoning. </i></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Our next weirdo, <span style="color: red;">Eclipso</span> is of the former kind. He just looks like someone you would come upon and he would do you personal hurt and for no better reason than that was his nature. Here's what he looks like:</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibwi_GMHpTzxfIBk-mMG2X-qpXgn66CQICep4TT0e-au8CtqVBz9V_Ui7Is-nckTIlah1956lypieQufnuUqU6AkTCxBMdqfK-LuEeAJagbGXYE3gkb8FE8ZdfhJtUoxfz7v2kuNhUARjK/s1600/Eclipso1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibwi_GMHpTzxfIBk-mMG2X-qpXgn66CQICep4TT0e-au8CtqVBz9V_Ui7Is-nckTIlah1956lypieQufnuUqU6AkTCxBMdqfK-LuEeAJagbGXYE3gkb8FE8ZdfhJtUoxfz7v2kuNhUARjK/s1600/Eclipso1.jpg" height="266" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Kind of a hyper-Joker (just as nuts but with a buttload of extra abilities) with a weird mission in life. Let me lay this bad guy out for you. First of all he possesses people, takes over their bodies. I hate that. No thank you. Please leave my mind and body alone. Next he hates light, so he wants to destroy the sun (thus the name Eclipso) or at least blot out its light. Personally, I think this is a bad idea. I like the sun and I think we'd all be worse off without it. I'm leaving out all his super powers - and he has a bunch of 'em - for a last look at another of his penchants. Long ago a crystal called The Heart of Darkness exploded and its pieces flew all over the world - were talking hundreds of pretty dark diamond-looking shards. So imagine yourself walking along a mountain road and you come across one of these pretty rocks and you pick it up. You are now marked for death. And who is your executioner - wait for it - Eclipso. Just for picking up a rock. That hardly seems fair.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="color: red;">Next up Abomination (is that a name or what?), Thanos, and...well you'll just have to see.</span></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-80258109868009962622014-12-06T06:58:00.000-08:002014-12-06T06:59:43.809-08:00Shakespearean Insults - Chapter 4<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixhMC98-yasCtPjvWvGcDidr6cNu-6CcqrZ5ozkPqY8AJ4OrFj9j4-lR_2QdxcG7dSXBX6miffC2PfhTut0mnRvsjZezgJhe-jZ2x7jtESCb12YysWyfnrX4d4t6j9LAL9DYrtCGW6Sy95/s1600/Shakespeare2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixhMC98-yasCtPjvWvGcDidr6cNu-6CcqrZ5ozkPqY8AJ4OrFj9j4-lR_2QdxcG7dSXBX6miffC2PfhTut0mnRvsjZezgJhe-jZ2x7jtESCb12YysWyfnrX4d4t6j9LAL9DYrtCGW6Sy95/s1600/Shakespeare2.jpg" height="400" width="295" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;">This, dear friends, shall be the last compendium of Willie's barbs. I hope you've enjoyed them as much as I have. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><i>His brain which is as dry as the remainder biscuit after a voyage.</i></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span>
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">You tread upon my patience.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>You egg, you fry of treachery.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Thou foul lump of deformity.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><i>Out of my sight, thou dost infect my eyes.</i></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span>
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><i>Thou poisonous bunch-backed toad.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">Beg that thou may leave to hang thyself.</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b>Vile worm, you were overlooked even in thy birth.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>Drunkenness is his best virtue.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>How foul and loathsome is thy image.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>Were I like thee, I would throw away myself.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">He has no so much brains as ear wax</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><i>I'll beat thee, but I should infect my hands.</i></b></span><br />
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;">And for our final insult something with a little more class</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b><i>You ruinous butt!!</i></b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-31534635861995593412014-12-05T00:35:00.001-08:002014-12-05T00:35:02.152-08:00Cool Shakespearean Insults - Chapter 3<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbbkPu7VUOHFdeA02ooJLh3LImoKwThthyiTbKzsjIAjvPzd_LYz7WLdEHI8uu4CJxeDXld62OL4IeUvFy_OHOyeMvImxXSsJK3SPcdBedETunUxD0BUjds3gBkjU4TGqWHgU8THB824Pk/s1600/shakespeare1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbbkPu7VUOHFdeA02ooJLh3LImoKwThthyiTbKzsjIAjvPzd_LYz7WLdEHI8uu4CJxeDXld62OL4IeUvFy_OHOyeMvImxXSsJK3SPcdBedETunUxD0BUjds3gBkjU4TGqWHgU8THB824Pk/s1600/shakespeare1.jpg" height="260" width="400" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b><i><span style="color: #4c1130;"><br /></span></i></b></span>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b><i><span style="color: #4c1130;">Tis true.</span> I could not stay away from the Bard of Avon's caustic wit. Verily, I have been entertained and so shall thee. Be thee prepared to howl.</i></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>Your bum is the greatest thing about you.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>You have such a February face.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Pray you, stand further from me.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>You lisp and wear strange suits.</i></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>What a disgrace it is to me that I should remember your name.</b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b><i>She hath more hair than wit.</i></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>You are strangely troublesome.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">I can hardly forebear hurling things at him.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Put your face between his sheets and do the office of a warming pan.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><i>I was seeking for a fool when I found you.</i></b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><i>And now one that translates through the ages.</i></b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Thou misshapen dick.</span><br />
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Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-40206401304235773502014-12-04T07:08:00.000-08:002014-12-04T07:08:32.713-08:00Creation Stories Chapter 3: Aztec and Egyptian - The Sun's Struggle vs The Sun's Tears<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i style="color: purple;">Egyptian Creation Story - </i>First of all let me present what I think is the coolest part of the Egyptian Creation saga. We are, all of us, the tears of the sun, literally the product of <span style="color: purple;"><i>Atum-Ra'</i></span>s saddness. Now to the rest of the story. <span style="color: purple;"><i>Atum-Ra</i></span>, <i><span style="color: purple;">the Sun God</span></i> was also the first god and all other gods sprung from his body. <i><span style="color: purple;">Shu</span></i> (<i><span style="color: purple;">the god of air</span></i>) and <span style="color: purple;"><i>Tefnut </i></span>(<span style="color: purple;"><i>the god of moisture in all its forms</i></span>) were born out of masturbation. These were the <i><span style="color: purple;">first male (Shu)</span></i> and <i><span style="color: purple;">female (Tefnut)</span></i>. This brother and sister gave birth to <span style="color: purple;"><i>Geb and Nut</i></span> (<i><span style="color: purple;">the Earth and Sky</span></i>). Once these gods were in place, <span style="color: purple;">Tefnut </span>became the <span style="color: purple;"><i>Maat</i></span>, the order bringer and arranged the Earth and its center Egypt. Thus all things were divinely placed: The sacred Nile, the Rites of Worship, The Floods, The roles for priests, the Pharaohs, the people. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Aztecs also worshiped the sun. In fact, if anything, they revered it more - to the tune of human sacrifice.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i><span style="color: red;">Aztec Creation Story</span></i><i style="color: #4c1130;"> - </i><span style="color: red;">In the beginning</span>, there was only the goddess <i><span style="color: red;">Omencihuatl</span></i> and her first act of creation was to manufacture a <span style="color: red;"><i>knife</i>.</span> I suppose that makes sense for a people who would need knives a lot. This knife fell to Earth (which I assume she also created) and from it sprang the kingdom of <i><span style="color: red;">Mexica</span></i> and the gods. As for the creation of everything else, this tale is called <i><span style="color: #4c1130;">"</span><span style="color: red;">The Myth of the Five Suns.</span><span style="color: #4c1130;">"</span></i> Like the story of the Navajo, there were worlds within worlds, five of them, each protected by a Sun God. <i><span style="color: red;">The First World</span></i>, in the North, was ruled by <i><span style="color: red;">Tezcatlipoca, God of Darkness</span></i>. It was <i><span style="color: red;">eaten by Tigers</span></i>. <span style="color: red;"><i>The Second world</i></span>, in the West was governed by <i><span style="color: red;">Quetzalcoatl, God of Magic</span></i>. It was <i><span style="color: red;">wiped out by Winds</span></i>. And oh yeah, it human inhabitants became monkeys.<span style="color: red;"><i>The Third World</i></span>, in the South, was <i><span style="color: red;">ruled Tlaloc, God of Fire</span></i>. It was rubbed out by a <i><span style="color: red;">Rain of Fire </span></i>and its humans became birds. <i><span style="color: red;">The Fourth World</span></i>, in the East was ruled over by the <span style="color: red;"><i>Goddess Chalchihuitlicue (Goddess of water</i></span><span style="color: #4c1130; font-style: italic;">)</span>. Appropriately this one was <i><span style="color: red;">wiped out by a flood</span></i>. I'm going to assume these guys became fish. <i><span style="color: red;">The Fifth World</span></i>, the one we all live in and which <i><span style="color: red;">Mexica</span></i> was its center, was and still is, <i><span style="color: red;">ruled over by another Fire God, Xuihtecuhtli</span></i>. When it is finally destroyed it will be wiped out by the Mother of all Earthquakes. </span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-54897694799756446822014-12-03T08:10:00.002-08:002014-12-03T08:15:44.349-08:00Creation Stories - Chapter 2: Native North American and African: Rising Up vs The World Egg<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">This is the second installment - see the earlier Scandinavian and Sumerian - in a multiple part series on creation stories. Since there were many North American creation stories, I have chosen the Navajo story. Similarly, there were a large number of African stories and I selected one, the Dogon Creation Story. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i style="color: red;">Navajo - </i>Even to this day there are a number of domed worlds - five altogether- built one atop the other. First world, deep underground was centered on a huge ocean and was populated by the <span style="color: red; font-style: italic;">Insect People, </span>led by <i><span style="color: red;">Locust</span></i><i><span style="color: red;">.</span></i> Because of the wrath of their gods they were forced upwards to the <span style="color: red;"><i>World of the Swallows</i></span>. Again they screwed up and had to rise up to the <i><span style="color: red;">Grasshopper World </span></i>where they blew it again and had to rise up to the <i style="color: red;">Kisani, </i>the <span style="color: red;"><i>Pueblo People</i></span>. The two races got along famously and together created <i><span style="color: red;">First Man</span></i> and <span style="color: red;"><i>First Woman.</i></span> These did their job and made many children. Two divine creatures, one called <i><span style="color: red;">Water Monster</span></i> and the other <span style="color: red;"><i>The Trickster Coyote</i></span> for some reason known only to the gods started kidnapping young girls. The people - both <span style="color: red;"><i>The Insect People</i></span> and the <i><span style="color: red;">Kisani</span></i> and the humans they created - were forced to go into hiding. A brave insect, <span style="color: red;"><i>Locust</i></span>, (kind of a bug Moses) led everyone out of this intolerable situation up into the Fifth World, the world they inhabit to this day.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b style="color: blue;"><i>Dogon Creation Story</i> (Africa) - </b>First there was the <span style="color: blue; font-style: italic;">World Egg </span>which had been fertilized by the creator, <i style="color: blue;">Amma. </i>The egg cracked into two halves each containing a set of divine identical twins, male and female. These four are called <i style="color: blue;">The Nummo. Amma </i>flung some divine clay from the heavens and created the <span style="color: blue;"><i>Earth</i></span>. These four took it into their heads to fall to the Earth and copulate with it and each other- thus humans came to be. Once the human race established itself, the original <i style="color: blue;">Nummo </i>twins became something that would feed all the world, the grasses of the plains. And from there they eternally watch over their creation.</span></span>
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Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-44845118804007236822014-12-02T11:35:00.001-08:002014-12-02T16:09:38.495-08:00Creation Myths - Chapter 1<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I found myself immersed in one creation story after another (I think Myth sounds a bit condescending) for the past few days so I thought I would share a few - maybe just two this time. There are a bunch from Native American to Buddhist to Scandinavian to Hebrew. All of them are fascinating.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: large;">I'm inclined to start here for no other reason that I think these guys influenced a number of other creation stories and many of the religions that began in the fertile crescent - they had the original flood story. Okay here's the skinny on how the world got going. </span><u style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>An</i></u><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: large;"> (Heaven) and </span><u style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>Ki</i></u><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: large;"> (Earth) - the original gods and the parents of the other gods - united to form </span><u style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>Anki</i></u><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: large;"> (the universe). The other gods came along later and began right off intermarrying. The children of these gods thought the necessary task of farming was too difficult so they created humans. This was done by the </span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><u>Nammu</u></i><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: large;"> (goddess of the water) who put her son to the task of making people. Once the humans started in on farming the gods organized the Tigris and Euphrates so the job could be easier. Strangely, it was the trickster god </span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><u>Enki</u></i><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: large;">, a notoriously lazy fellow, who got most of this going. Rumor has it that he used his penis to fill the rivers and streams. He also wanted to use that same penis to impregnate the maiden goddess </span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><u>Uttu</u> </i><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: large;">but she would not agree until he invented vegetation - fruits and vegetables. He must have wanted her pretty bad because he presented her with three of his inventions: apples, cucumbers, and grapes. She gave in and their offspring invented all the other fruits of the fields.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Let's go to another part of the world to see how they started everything. Whereas <span style="color: red;"><b>Sumerians</b></span> used sex to begin the world - they revered the sexual act as divine, <b>Scandinavians</b> used a combination of sex and murder (strangely enough the Greeks started creation with a patricide).</span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-size: large;"><b>Norse</b> - </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">When the void, or at least near-void existed there were three regions: <i><u>Mudspell</u></i> in the south - all molten rock and inhabited by a demon named <i><u>Black Surt</u></i> who wielded a flaming sword always ready to destroy anything even remotely looking like creation. <i><u>Niflheim</u></i> in the north, all ice and frost. And finally between them both <i><u>Ginungagap,</u></i> a wet place of rivers but still kind of sterile. In this middle region was born a frost giant named Ymir, who had a propensity for other beings to spring out of his orifices. An man and a woman sprang out of his armpits. A family of frost giants emerged from between his legs. From his middle came the first cow, <i><u>Audumla.</u></i> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> <i><u>Audumla</u></i> licked at the borders of ice around the rivers and <i><u>Buri</u></i>, one of the original gods came forth. He married one of the frost giants and they had a son, <i><u>Bor</u></i>. <i><u>Bor</u></i> married <i><u>Bestla</u></i>, another frost giant - I guess the gene pool was kind of restricted. But here's where things get interesting. <i><u>Bestla </u></i>had three children <i><u>Odin, Vili, and Ve</u></i>. These guys must have been born belligerent because the first thing they did was kill the original Frost Giant <u><i>Ymir</i></u> and from his flesh and bones they created the world. His blood made the oceans and lakes. The sky came from his skull. They made the walls of <u><i>Mitgard</i></u> (that's the Earth for you people who didn't see the movie Thor) from his eyebrows - imagine that! They then created <i><u>Embla</u></i>, the first woman (I know. I thought a woman sprang from Ymir's armpit) and <i><u>Ask</u></i>, the first man. I guess it was a big deal to have dwarfs because they were created out of the maggots feasting on Ymir's flesh. <i><u>Mitgard</u></i> was given to these two as their home and they went straight about making all the people who came after. <i><u>Asgard</u></i> the home of the gods was the last thing to be created. Of course, in the middle of all this creating there were heavenly wars, ...and more wars...and more wars. Vikings loved to fight.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Coming attractions - Native American and Chinese Creation Stories. Stay tuned.</i></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-14350682322400121362014-11-30T06:15:00.000-08:002014-11-30T06:15:10.792-08:00Cool Shakespearean Insults - Chapter 2<span style="font-size: large;">I don't know about you but I'm ready for some more put downs from the Bard. I am continually amazed at his use of common words in uncommon ways to create fabulous burns. So gentle people let the games begin.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>I do desire we may be better strangers.</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Thou frothy flap-mouthed minnow.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>You scullion! You rampallian! You Fustilarian! I'll tickle your catastrophe.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><i>Thou puking dismal-dreaming horn.</i></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Villain, I have done thy mother.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>Thou spleeny flap-mouthed harpy.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>They lie deadly when they tell you, you have good faces.</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Thou rank beef-witted measle.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><i>Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch.</i></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>Thou churlish fen-sucked strumpet.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>Away, moldy rogue, away!</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I think thou wast created for men to breathe themselves upon you.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>More of your conversation would infect my brain.</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b> </b>I wonder that you still be talking. Nobody marks you.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Well, that's all for now. I challenge you to use one of these pithy phrases on an acquaintance who doest thou find irksome.</span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-58524362073738691872014-11-29T07:51:00.000-08:002014-11-29T07:52:45.136-08:00Comic Book (Graphic Novels) Villains : The Good, The Bad, The Ugly<span style="font-size: large;">The new 'Avengers' movie will feature the Hyper-Villain Ultron. I recently started up a conversation about this massively powerful super creep. In the entire group I was in, no one even knew who this bad guy was.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Also, with the upcoming crossover between 'Arrow' and 'The Flash' which features Captain Boomerang, I wondered who might appreciate a heads up about this guy - although with all the mega-humans coming out of the woodwork on 'Flash', I'm thinking it might not be the same guy. In any event, I'm going to give you the low down on several of the coolest, weirdest, baddest super (and not so super) villains in both the Marvel and DC universe.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Let's begin with <i><b>Ultron</b></i> - First of all, Ultron is a robot, albeit one with a mind of its own (no three laws for him). Henry Pym (The Ant Man, a superhero destined to have a movie of his own in the near future) created Ultron and implanted his own brain patterns into his creation. Ultron rebelled and decided that the human race needed to be exterminated. Go Figure. Like Wolverine, Ulton - or at least a subsequent upgrade of the robot - is made of indestructible Adamantium. He is also incredibly strong (we're talking Hulk strong), almost invulnerable, can fly, and can put large numbers of folks in a trace with just a glance. And one more thing, if he is defeated, like the robot in the 'The Incredibles', he recreates himself with new enhancements. At last count, there was an Ultron 15.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Captain Boomerang - </i>Alias George 'Digger' Harkness, the good Captain is an enemy of The Flash. First of all, he uses boomerangs like Batman uses the weapons in his utility belt or Arrow uses his specialized arrows. On top of that, he had, in a limited sense, the ability to match Flash's bursts of speed. He has tangled with the Flash on more than one occasion and of course lost.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Dormammu - </i>Rumor has it that Marvel is planning to release a Doctor Strange movie. As a fan of the super-mystic Strange, I am looking forward to this one. Anyway, one of the most powerful adversaries - and I believe the very enemy that Strange will face in the movie - Dormammu is a bad ass. Demonlike, he appears surrounded in a corona of fire. Like Strange he is a master of the Mystic Arts. He has conquered and subjugated a butt-load of alternate dimensions but the one he has set his sights on is ours. He can travel effortlessly between these dimensions, alter his size and strength, travel in time, and is a master of telepathy. Oh yeah, he can transform others into copies of himself and equip them with his powers.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Gorilla Grodd - </i>Recently on the TV show 'The Flash' the mysterious wheel-chaired mastermind Harrison Wells (Just who the heck is this guy anyway?) went into his secret sanctum and addressed a creature in a cage marked Gorilla Grodd. I said--out loud at the time--wait a minute, one of Flash's big time adversaries is Gorilla Grodd. This bad simian is a member of a race of super-apes who have kept their existence a secret from humanity. Grodd can control the minds of others, transfer his consciousness into others, transform matter with his will, and if all of this wasn't bad enough, he is a genius on the order of Lex Luther. What the heck is he doing in a cage in a back wing of Harrison Well's abode?</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">The Absorbing Man - </i>If you're a fan of Marvel's Agents of Shield you've seen this nightmare on two different episodes. Carl 'Crusher' Creel is featured on the show as a thrall of Hydra (Hail Hydra!!!) but the original Creel was a creation of Asgard (who are also featured from time to time on Marvel's Agents of Shield). Loki, Thor's evil half-brother endowed Creel with the power to absorb and become anything he touches. This includes energy or even sometimes the powers of his adversaries, one of which was Thor the Thunder God. He had fought the Hulk to a standstill by absorbing his strength. He carries a ball and chain which he uses the way Thor uses his hammer.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">The Penguin - </i>One of my favorite shows this season is 'Gotham' and my favorite character on this excellent show is Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot. On the TV show he is a manipulative genius, a ruthless adversary<b>, </b>and someone who seems destined to rise up through the ranks of Gotham's underworld. In graphic novels (and one so-so movie) he is a foe of Batman. Like Moriarity of Sherlock Holmes fame, The Penguin prefers to remain behind the scenes doing nefarious deeds in secret - pulling the strings as it were. Occasionally he confronts Batman and Robin directly, usually in some plot involving birds. He has also teamed up with a few other of Batman's enemies and has come close to putting the Caped Crusader on ice.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">The Riddler - </i>Another character on 'Gotham' is a criminologist named Edward Nigma. Currently, he is just an annoying fidget who seems obsessed with puzzles and riddles. This scenario is slightly different from the one presented in the comics of my youth but the outcome appears to heading the same way. E. Nigma (get it?!) will eventually decide to go to the dark side and will become the criminal The Riddler. In this persona, he will, like The Penguin, become a foe of Batman and Robin. A genius with puzzles, Nigma can't resist leaving riddling clues which eventually lead to his downfall.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-44403310357693581082014-11-28T07:46:00.000-08:002014-11-28T07:46:07.918-08:00The Theory of Everything<span style="font-size: large;">I can't deny it. I love movies. For less than ten dollars (sometime a whole lot less) I get to enjoy a film that might cost a half billion dollars to make.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">That said, it's a real treat when a movie not only touches my heart, but uplifts it as well. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">The Theory of Everything is a significant section of the life of Stephen Hawking - from 1963 when he was a Science student at Cambridge trying to decide on a direction for his thesis to close to the present. It is not science heavy but more revolves around the relationship between him and his wife Jane Wilde. And of course there is his neurological disorder. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> The acting is superb. The writing is funny, poignant, sweet, and articulate. I do believe Eddie Redmayne (think Les Miserables) as Hawking never lets us forget there is a living breathing man inside the deteriorating shell of the scientist. There's a scene where he plays with his children, careening around his living room on his electric wheelchair--lovely</span><span style="font-size: large;">. Felicity Jones as his courageous wife Jane is powerful at the same time as being breathtaking in her depth. The supporting cast is terrific as well, from David Thewlis as Dennis Sciama, Stephen's mentor who became his lifelong friend to Charlie Cox a music teacher who became so much more.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I could go on and on but I hope I've convinced you to give this one a try. You won't be disappointed.</span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-85296596617450103872014-11-28T00:34:00.000-08:002014-11-28T00:34:59.633-08:00Incredibly Cool Fictional Horses - Chapter 1 <span style="font-size: large;">Once I got hooked on famous steeds and their equally famous riders, I found myself staring at an even more fascinating group of equines - Famous Fictional Horses. Here are a few. I hope you find them as entertaining as I did.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Shadowfax - </i>Lord of the Rings fans will know this magical horse who aligned himself with Gandalf. This steed belonging to the city of Gondor, would be Gandalf's (both as Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White) companion through all of his battles to save Middle Earth.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Fatty Lumpkin - </i>While were talking about LOTR we can't forget Tom Bombadil (although Peter Jackson did in his three movie series). Bombadil rode Fatty as he accompanied the Hobbits on a leg of their quest to keep the infamous Ring of Power out of the hands of the Black Riders.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Arion - </i>Some horses in mythology are not altogether normal. Arion the steed of Hercules, had the feet of a human on his right side.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Sleipnir </i>- Another horse that was different from your run of the mill equine, Sleipnir belonged to Father god Odin. And oh yeah, he had eight legs--which strikes me as bit arachnid.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Tornado - </i>It didn't matter if he was being chased by one horse or an army, Tornado, the jet black steed of swordsman Zorro, could not be caught.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Widowmaker - </i>Some horses won't put up with just anybody riding them. This lightning bolt of a pony belonging to the rootenest, tootenest cowboy in the whole west, Pecos Bill, did not take a shine to Bill's girlfriend Slufoot Sue. When she plopped herself down on his back he bucked her clear to the moon. That is why coyotes, to this day, bay at the moon every night.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">And let's end with a biblical equine, although this one is a donkey.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Balaam's Ass - </i>It came as quite a surprise to Balaam when what he thought was an ordinary donkey started talking. Balaam who was in the process of disobeying the God of the Old Testament, couldn't see that God intended to slay both rider and donkey but the ass could. After simply balking and refusing to ride into certain destruction, the donkey turned to Balaam and called him a fool. </span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-88606431668181604712014-11-25T19:41:00.000-08:002014-11-25T19:41:28.528-08:00Famous Historical Horses and Their Riders<span style="font-size: large;">Don't ask me why, but I recently became obsessed with famous people and the horses they rode in on. Hopefully, you'll also enjoy a bit of back story to go with your horsey facts. Soooooo, without further ado, Here are the equines:</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Bucephalus - </i>When Alexander was a mere stripling, this formidable steed was deemed unrideable. The beast would have been killed if little Alex hadn't interceded on it's behalf. The deal was that if Alexander could bend the animal to his will, the horse would his. Truth was, the horse from Hell almost killed Alexander on more than one occasion but in the end horse and rider became fast friends. Bucephalus would become the warhorse that Alexander the Great rode into battle.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b style="font-style: italic;">Traveler - </b>This horse, belonging to General Robert E Lee was considered the 'finest looking horse I ever laid eyes on'. The man doted on Traveler, being seen in the company of the animal in over a dozen photographs. Needless to say, Lee rode his favorite horse into more than one battle.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Comanche - </i>Belonging to General George Custer, Comanche was one of the few horses to survive the battle of Little Big Horn. The victorious Sioux and Arapaho recognized a good horse when they saw one and kept the animal to its dying day.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Nelson & Blueskin - </i>At Valley Forge, Washington didn't just have one horse, he had two as he struggled through the bitter winter of 1775. Not much is known of these two noble steeds except that both horses, like Washington himself, survived the ordeal.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Incitatus - </i>This horse, belonging to crazy-as-a-bedbug Roman Emperor Caligula lived a charmed life. While the mad emperor was setting fire to friends and members of the senate, he pampered Incitatus, making him a Roman Consul and feeding him powdered gold. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Morengo - </i>Napolean is shown riding Morengo in the famous painting by Jacques-Louis David. Many scholars question if this horse of legend actually existed while other claim this was the animal that Napolean rode into the Battle of Waterloo.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Brown Beauty - </i>The truth is that Paul Revere did not own the horse he rode on his famous ride. In fact, many scholars say that name of the steed in unknown, but a select group of historians say the horse Paul borrowed that night from chair-maker Samuel Larkin was indeed named Brown Beauty.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> <i style="font-weight: bold;">Red Fox - </i>If you rob banks and trains for a living, you need a fast horse. Jesse James had what many people considered the fastest horse in the west. After Jesse quit his thieving ways, he made a bundle (before being shot from behind by Bob Ford) racing Red Fox.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Old Bob - </i>Not much is know about this horse with a less than impressive name except that he was the favorite horse of Abraham Lincoln. </span><br />
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<br />Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7291959289927933385.post-54440669207714857672014-11-24T08:00:00.000-08:002014-11-25T08:24:08.371-08:00Cool Shakespearean Insults <span style="font-size: large;">I have never met anyone who didn't know some of the Bard's put downs - 'Cankerblossom' comes to mind.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">For this list I have chosen some that I think are richer, more textured, and might even be used today - Shakespeare is nothing if not timeless. I will first give the play, so you can go look up the insult in context if you so desire. So without further ado (about nothing, hee hee) let the insults fly.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">As You Like It - </i>Let's meet as little as we can.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Henry IV, part 1 - </i>Why, thou clay-brained guts, thou knotty-pated fool, thou whoreson obscene greasy tallow-catch.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">All's Well That Ends Well - </i>Methinks thou art a general offense, and every man should beat thee.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Henry V - </i>Thou damned and luxurious mountain goat.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">King John - </i>There is not yet so ugly a fiend of hell<b> </b>as thou shall be</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">King Lear - </i>Thou art a boil, a plague sore, an embossed carbuncle in my corrupted blood.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Measure for Measure - </i>Come, you are a tedious fool.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Timon of Athens - </i>Would thou were clean enough to spit upon.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Troilus and Cressida - </i>Thou hast no more brain than I have in my elbows.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">A Midsummer's Night's Dream - </i>I am sick when I look upon thee.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">And now one that gets right to the point.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">The Winter's Tale - </i>Go rot!</span>Robert Spillerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02508547891422075914noreply@blogger.com2